How to Talk to Strangers Online

Learn how to start talking to strangers without being awkward about it.
Your journey to become a small talking friend-making expert starts here.

Talk to strangers

You are at a bar. Or a party. Everyone seems to have great fun. But you. You hesitate on what questions you should ask, if you were to start talking to a stranger. Small talk maybe isn't your best sport. Yet.

The first thing to keep in mind that this social skill isn't static. It can be trained and improved.

The difference between chatting with strangers online and in real-life

A great way to train the skill of approaching strangers is to talk to strangers online. A chat online between two strangers can be easier – it's all about the text messages and not eye contact, body language and so on. To focus on purely one thing makes it feel less awkward.

Why Should I Talk to Strangers?

I bet you remember that day when you started to talk to a stranger and it made your day. Some of us have the gift that makes talking to strangers the most natural thing in the world (which it is!). Others just need a little bit of practice.

In most cases, talking to strangers will make you will feel more alive and happy. Loneliness is a known risk factor: it can shorten your life.

Studies show that people are happier when they have more social interactions:
"...we are happier when being social, interacting with people we know and like, and having more in-depth conversations in which we disclose more."

How to Talk to Strangers?

  1. Be brave and worry less.

    If you struggle to make contact with people in the physical world, try to talk to strangers online as a start. It will help you when you talk to strangers in the physical world later.

    Try not to overthink it, just start a conversation. So what if the gets awkward? If you keep going with the chat, it will probably be better very soon.
  2. Make eye contact

    Try to make eye contact and smile. A friendly expression signals that you are open to connect with other people.

  3. Be curious.

    Ask questions to the stranger you are talking to. Let them know that you want to get to know them.

  4. Find the common grounds.

    Try to find commonalities between you and the stranger you are talking to. Why are you at the same place? Do you have any mutual friends?

  5. Chat responsibly

    Even though this chat is moderated, frogs sometimes slips through our mouth. Help us by keeping our community as friendly as possible

  6. Look out for each other

    If you see any form of harassment, report it to a moderator.

How to Talk to Strangers during Pandemic?

During a pandemic, people ought to stay inside and meet as few other people as possible. So, what now? Well, remember that even though online can't replace real life, online is safe, even during a pandemic.

Remember the human at the other end

We are all Internet friends here. Do your best to make the stranger you talk to feel as great as possible.

Talk to Strangers
Talk to Strangers

What Books Cover How to Talk to Strangers?

  1. How to Talk to Anyone: 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships by Leil Lowndes.

    This book will help you with the following:

    • 9 ways to make a dynamite first impression
    • 14 ways to master small talk, “big talk,” and body language
    • 14 ways to walk and talk like a VIP or celebrity
    • 6 ways to sound like an insider in any crowd
    • 7 ways to establish deep subliminal rapport with anyone
    • 9 ways to feed someone’s ego (and know when NOT to!)
    • 11 ways to make your phone a powerful communications tool
    • 15 ways to work a party like a politician works a room
    • 7 ways to talk with tigers and not get eaten alive
  2. Talking to Strangers: What We Should Know about the People We Don't Know by Malcom Gladwell.

    Best book of the year according to Best Book of the Year: The Financial Times, Bloomberg, Chicago Tribune, and Detroit Free Press.

  3. How to Talk to Anyone About Anything: Improve Your Social Skills, Master Small Talk, Connect Effortlessly, and Make Real Friends (Communication Skills Training) by James W Williams.

    Improve your communication skills in the following ways:

    • Stand tall as you uncover your potential and harness the power of your confidence
    • Hone your listening skills to establish stronger connections with everyone around you
    • Ask the right questions and make seamless conversations with colleagues, bosses, and potential partners
    • Make conversations and interactions less daunting using powerful tips on how you can master the art of small talk
    • Find out how to tell, structure, and design amazing stories to tell people based on your own life experiences
    • Become more confident and charismatic in every area of your life and watch as your relationships improve and your networks grow
    • Strengthen relationships, whether it be for work or your personal life, and improve your overall wellbeing and success

How Can I Talk to a Girl Online?

A common feeling when you go to a bar or a club is that there are more men than women. According to, the 'natural' sex ratio at birth is around 105 boys per 100 girls.

There are lots of girls who chat online. According to our analytics tool, 33% of our users are girls.